Weekly TKD Lesson

“Some people have greatness thrust upon them. Few have excellence
thrust upon them – they achieve it. They do not achieve it
unwittingly by doing what comes naturally and they don’t stumble
into it in the course of amusing themselves. All excellence
involves discipline and tenacity of purpose.'”

      John William Gardner 1912-2002, Psychologist

 

One of the keys to success is staying motivated because it is being
motivated that keeps us going out the door every day to change the
world and reach our destiny! It is our desire for a better life,
for change in ourselves and others, and for personal growth and
fulfillment that moves our mountains!

Desire!

Desire sure is a word with much more richness to it than the word
“want” though they are essentially the same. “Want,” though, sounds
like you could take it or leave it. “Desire” says, “I have to have
it!” Desire, is “want” with a fire under it!

Unfortunately, we tend to ebb and flow from want to desire, even
with the same goal! One day we may be passionate about building our
business or growing our relationships and then, the next day, we
find ourselves simply in the “want” camp again.

The key to keeping on is to re-light the fire under want so it
roars into a raging fire of desire! Then, and only then, will we
see the passion needed to be tenacious pursuers of our dreams!

Keeping the fire lit is what will see you through the mountains and
valleys of life and the journey you are on to your success!

So what do we do? We light the fire! Here are a few thoughts to
help you build the fire of your desire!

The wood:
Keep a clear mental picture of the goal. This is imperative. The
picture of the goal is like the wood in a fire. It is the raw
material. Know what your goal is and what it looks like.

The fuel:
Keep a list, if simply just a mental one, of all of the benefits of
pursuing and reaching your goal. Make them as “sense” oriented as
possible. “See” the benefits. “Hear” them. “Touch” them. This is
like the fuel that we add to a fire to get it going. Now all we
need is a match.

The match:
Keep yourself active! This is the match: Action! Even when you
don’t feel like it, get yourself to act and soon you will see the
fire burning because you have again ignited the dream! The more
desire you have the more the fire burns.

Eventually the fire will begin to die out. Here is where you throw
the wood on again, pour on some fuel, and if need be, strike
another match. I would encourage you to not let the fire go out
though, because it is easier to continually throw wood and fuel on
an already burning fire than it is to start one up again!
“A posse ad esse”

To Your Success

Weekly TKD Lesson

Parents be role models for your children

Here is what we can all do to help keep our children “violence-free”

Parents and caregivers are vital to the healthy development and growth of children. We all know this, but what can we do better to enrich our children? Helping children learn more about themselves and their environment can be a key step in preventing school and youth violence. Parents want children to be safe, and children want to feel and be safe.

The following information will be both helpful to you as a parent and caregiver, as well as to your children. So take time to read and make time to share this with your children. Violence prevention begins with YOU. Remember to make time to listen and  take time to talk…these can be precious moments.

Nurture

Show love and concern

  • Every day, tell your child you love him/her.
  • Show affection daily with a hug, a kiss, and/or a touch.
  • Make time for special family fun activities.
  • Meet your child’s friends to ensure he/she has positive influences.

Emotions

Understand – don’t take a stand

Children who don’t know how to control their anger are more likely to fight. Teach children how to calm down and talk over their problems. Tips for keeping cool and solving a problem:

  • Keep in mind that anger is real, but it usually goes away.
  • To calm down, think about or do things you enjoy.
  • Once you have calmed down, think about the problem with a clear head.
  • Take steps to solve the problem.

Communication

Is a two-way street

Children who have good communication with their parents are more likely to ask for their advice than turn to peers. When talking to your child, always remember to:

  • Listen to your child.
  • Find out what your child knows about violence and how to prevent it before you start talking.
  • Let your child know he/she can always talk to you about anything.

RESPECT

Find out what it means to me

Many youth fight because they feel disregarded and, as a result, feel angry, humiliated, or embarrassed. To stay violence-free, respect means:

  • Give respect so you may get respect.
  • Stand up for yourself without putting yourself in danger.
  • Discuss ways to solve problems without fighting.
  • Respect is not gained by physical force or intimidation, but by the quality of your character.
  • Fighting doesn’t solve a problem or get you respect.

Education

Everyone benefits

Take interest in your child’s education and development:

  • Read to your child and encourage your child to read.
  • Meet with your child’s teachers often and learn about your child’s progress.
  • Review homework and tests.
  • Set short- and long-term educational goals together and help your children reach their goals.
  • Encourage your child to participate in an after-school program.
  • Give your child household responsibilities/chores.
  • Children who aren’t interested in school, who have friends who use alcohol/drugs, and who are not bound by rules are more likely to use alcohol/drugs.
  • Let your child know you disapprove of drug use, including alcohol, and WHY.

Peaceful solutions …another way

How to get your way without fighting:

  • Talk clearly and calmly. State the problem and your desire to solve it without fighting.
  • Humor—Make fun of the problem.
  • Compromise—Both give up something and get something.
  • Avoid/ignore—Sometimes it’s not worth the bother.
  • Remember, it takes more guts and self-respect to walk away from a fight than to fight.

Bullying… NO WAY

Prevent your child from becoming a VICTIM:

  • Instill self-confidence in your child.
  • Help your child establish good social skills.
  • Teach your child to speak out for him or herself.
  • Teach your child to seek, if harassed, help from you and other caring adults.
  • Try to meet with the bully to work things out. If the problem continues,call for a meeting of all those involved.

Prevent your child from becoming a BULLY:

  • Present yourself as a model of nonviolent behavior.
  • Clearly state that violence is not acceptable.
  • Assist your child in finding nonviolent strategies for anger management and conflict resolution.
  • Seek help from mental health/school counselors to help stop bullying and aggressive behavior.

Gangs are not family

Many youth join gangs looking for affection. Gangs only look out for their own interests and forget about yours. Gangs are violent…they intimidate, hurt, and kill people. Gangs lead to self-destruction.

GUNS…Not the Solution

  • The presence of guns can turn conflicts into violent confrontations resulting in serious injury or death.
  • Guns are more likely to kill a friend or family member (unintentionally or through suicide) than an enemy.
  • Parents-don’t own a gun; but if you do, store it unloaded and uncocked in a locked place.
  • Children should be taught not to touch or play with firearms.

SEEING VIOLENCE…Through a Child’s Eyes

Children who have seen violence are more likely to become involved in violence as victims or perpetrators. You can:

  • Minimize your child’s exposure to violence.
  • Tell your child that media violence is not real – it is glamorized, misleading, and fails to depict the real pain and suffering of the victims.
  • Talk to your child about the violence he or she witnessed.
  • If you see changes in your child, after they’ve witnessed a violent act, talk to a mental health professional.
  • Some warning signs of emotional distress related to witnessing violence include sleeplessness, lack of appetite, lack of attention, anxiety, and frequent thoughts or flashbacks of the event.

Rules for quality time together

TEENS

  • Don’t insult, shout, walk out or away…SHOW RESPECT.

PARENTS

  • Don’t boss, preach, judge, or criticize…SHOW RESPECT.

FOR BOTH

  • Spend more than 15 minutes each day together listening and talking.
  • Don’t have outside interruptions.
  • Don’t blame or try to defend anyone.
  • DO MAKE one-on-one time SPECIAL.

Be a role model

  • Warm family relationships protect children FROM violence and many other risky behaviors.
  • Be aware that everything you do, your children see and do.
  • Talk to them and, most important, listen to them.
  • Spend valuable time with them that includes funactivities.
  • Find out who their friends are and if they are a positive influence.
  • Find out where they hang out and make sure it’s safe.
  • Let them know you disapprove of fighting.
  • Keep your children “drug and violence-free.”

 

Weekly TKD Lesson

A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.
    — Mark Twain, 1835-1910, American Writer and Humorist


Perhaps you are asking, “What is personal empowerment?”
Put in simplistic terms, empowerment is freeing yourself from
limitations or living a life of misery and taking full
responsibility for everything that is in your life.

 
It’s about quitting making excuses for things that aren’t going
right in your life and DOING something about changing them!
It’s about choices, the choices that you make on a daily basis
regarding all aspects of your life.

 
It’s about being in control of what you allow in your life, who you
associate with, what you read, what you watch on television and at
the movies, who your mentors are, what music you listen to, what
you eat, etc.

 
Why are these choices so important to empowerment? … You
literally ARE your choices.

 
A general definition: empowerment is a process that helps people
gain control over their own lives.

 
Therefore, empowerment is about learning there are choices, in
which you have the right to be the healthiest and happiest person
you can be in this now. The past is the past, and it cannot be
changed; therefore, the focus is placed upon what you can do in
this very moment.

 
What choices can you make to empower yourself NOW?
As you exercise your choices and take responsibility and action,
you will gain increased control over your life.

Weekly TKD Lesson

“People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success
because they don’t know when to quit. Most men succeed
 because they are determined to.”
                                  –George E. Allen

An important principle of success in all walks of life and in all
occupations is a willingness to GO THE EXTRA MILE; which means the
rendering of more and better service than that for which one is
paid, and giving it in a positive mental attitude.

 
Search wherever you will for a single sound argument against this
principle, and you will not find it; nor will you find a single
instance of enduring success which was not attained in part by its
application.

 
The principle is not the creation of man. It is a part of Nature’s
handiwork, for it is obvious that every living creature below the
intelligence of man is forced to apply the principle in order to
survive.

 
Man may disregard the principle if he chooses, but he cannot do so
and at the same time enjoy the fruits of enduring success.
Observe how Nature applies this principle in the production of food
that grows from the soil, where the farmer is forced to GO THE
EXTRA MILE by clearing the land, plowing it, and planting the seed
at the right time of the year, for none of which he receives any
pay in advance.

 
But, observe that if he does his work in harmony with Nature’s
laws, and performs the necessary amount of labor, Nature takes over
the job where the farmer’s labor ends, germinates the seed he
plants and develops it into a crop of food.

 
And, observe thoughtfully this significant fact: For every grain of
wheat or corn he plants in the soil Nature yields him perhaps a
hundred grains, thus enabling him to benefit by the law of
increasing returns.